Everyone wants a little excitement from the sexual relationship. Maybe you are in a relationship and you have reached a bit of a slump where the fires don’t seem to be burning as bright as they used to. Maybe you have been thinking, with the help of your partner, on how to spice up the romance. Maybe you have made the very big decision to bring a third person into the bedroom and give you sex a little more excitement. While no one can know for sure how such an event will go, you should caution against it. There is no reason to invite another party into the bedroom for a couple of reasons.
If you are making the decision to have someone join you in the bedroom because your sex is lacking a flare or excitement these days, you have different issues than needing a third party. The problem you seem to be having may be one within the relationship and that needs to be fixed by you are your partner and done without another person.
You and your partner share an intimate bond when you have sex. It’s about feelings you have built for each other and a caring you have for each other every time you have sex. Inviting another person to share in that intimate bond cheapens the bond itself. It’s a very difficult thing to remain true and intimate when there is someone else in bed with you. You have spent a long time building that bond it would be a shame to watch it diminish in one night.
No matter how much you discuss the possible pitfalls and issues in having sex with a third person, nothing can prepare you for how you might feel afterward. A lot of things can happen during a sexual encounter that change the opinions someone had before going into it. Even if you have a long talk after sex there is a chance that things between you and your partner could be altered forever. Is any fun and exciting thing in your bedroom worth that risk?
If the most interesting thing that you and your significant other have talked about recently is getting pet insurance, you may need to start thinking about spicing things up a little. For many couples, the lack of a good sexual relationship can be a sign of a much bigger problem. Though this is not always the case, it wouldn’t hurt to talk to your partner about what is going on.
Many times, a lack of sexual activity in an otherwise healthy relationship can be caused by quite a few different factors. If one or both of you deal with stressful jobs on a daily basis, unfortunately that stress can be brought home. Along with this, if you are going all the time, with little to no time to rest and relax, it may just be simple exhaustion that is getting in the way of your sex life. These are things that can easily be overcome, with just a little bit of time and energy. Talk about what the problem is. If you feel extremely tired and just don’t feel you have the energy for sex, let your partner know. Take some time to relax, and try to remember that sex is not a chore. It is a fun, great way to show your significant other that you love them.
Another reason that is prevalent for lack of sex in a relationship is that one or both of you may be dealing with depression. Depression is a serious problem for many people, and many times, with the onset of depression, the amount of sex that a couple has will significantly drop. If this is the case, and one of you is dealing with depression, it could be a good idea to seek out counseling. Getting through the depression, or even being able to work around it, can be a huge help for any sexual relationship.
Just because you have had sex before doesn’t mean every new person you begin to date is an open invitation to have sex with that person. Every new person you date brings forth another new decision on weather or not to engage in sexual intercourse and that must be a decision that is given careful thought and you should consider a few things before entering into a sexual relationship.
The first thing is length of time. Far too often people want to skip the part where they truly get to know someone. You should know three things about your prospective partner before deciding to have sex with them. Who are there last 3 relationships? What are the names of their aunts and uncles? Where did they go to grade school?
These seem like silly things that you would need to know but they serve as a good rule of thumb when deciding when is the right time to have sex. If you haven’t known them long enough to find out those three pieces of information then you haven’t known them long enough to have sex. Not only that but you want to make sure you are aware of their past relationships so you know who it is you are dating. What they tell you about a previous relationship can determine a lot about you having sex with them.
The other criteria should be when your comfort level is at an all time high. If there is even a doubt in your mind then it is certainly time to wait. Sex is such an important responsibility that you must not enter into it lightly. You will need to make sure that this person is worthy to experience something so intimate with you. And you need to make sure they are clean.
This cannot be stressed enough. It’s of course nice to take their word for it but in this world of sexually transmitted infections you can never be too careful. Forget what they have told and hold out for proof above all else. If they can’t produce it then sex can wait.
