Everyone wants a little excitement from the sexual relationship. Maybe you are in a relationship and you have reached a bit of a slump where the fires don’t seem to be burning as bright as they used to. Maybe you have been thinking, with the help of your partner, on how to spice up the romance. Maybe you have made the very big decision to bring a third person into the bedroom and give you sex a little more excitement. While no one can know for sure how such an event will go, you should caution against it. There is no reason to invite another party into the bedroom for a couple of reasons.
If you are making the decision to have someone join you in the bedroom because your sex is lacking a flare or excitement these days, you have different issues than needing a third party. The problem you seem to be having may be one within the relationship and that needs to be fixed by you are your partner and done without another person.
You and your partner share an intimate bond when you have sex. It’s about feelings you have built for each other and a caring you have for each other every time you have sex. Inviting another person to share in that intimate bond cheapens the bond itself. It’s a very difficult thing to remain true and intimate when there is someone else in bed with you. You have spent a long time building that bond it would be a shame to watch it diminish in one night.
No matter how much you discuss the possible pitfalls and issues in having sex with a third person, nothing can prepare you for how you might feel afterward. A lot of things can happen during a sexual encounter that change the opinions someone had before going into it. Even if you have a long talk after sex there is a chance that things between you and your partner could be altered forever. Is any fun and exciting thing in your bedroom worth that risk?
Here’s a basic question: When does sex begin? That may seem like a silly question, but do you know the answer? Few do, and certainly not anyone under the age of 18!
Does it begin when a couple begins holding hands? Or does it begin once an organ is inserted into a cavity? Does it begin with tantalizing looks and the explicit exposure of skin in clothing bought at exorbitant prices, or does it begin with a hand down the trousers?
While these questions may simply be philosophical issues best left to Ph.d’s in a laboratory, they carry significant weight and implications to your life and a probably the health and well-being of your current or future family.
Few recognize today that sex can begin well before two individuals are cavorting in the back of a car. Perhaps it is classified as “allure” or “seduction.” In either case, it is best to be conscious of it and to acknowledge its ramifications. More than one innocent youth in the history of mankind has been lead astray by a pair of tight pants and a steamy look!
Understanding and acknowledgement of lewd behavior can save you time and energy. A person can be spared the inconvenience of an unwanted sexual encounter simply by recognizing what another is communicating with his or her clothing and attitude. The rock n’roll culture of today has become so common-place, in fact, that most people don’t recognize that gyrating hips implies sexual activity!
If you can learn to spot behavior patterns which are precursors to sex, you can avoid a lot of complications and damaging behavior. You can learn to say “no” to a person well before you are vainly trying to remove his or her hands from your clothing. Let’s face it: once the hormones are a-boiling, it becomes more and more difficult to say you don’t want to have sex. It’s better to recognize the signs of sex well in advance.
When someone has a serious illness, it can be difficult for them to show much interest in sex. Some of these people also have interest in sex, but they just cannot get their bodies to do what they want. In other words, they don’t have the strength of the ability to have sex, even if their mind is willing. They might also have to wait for clearance from their doctor so they can enjoy sexual activity again. If you find yourself in that situation, be patient. While sex is important to a lot of people, there are plenty of other pursuits that you can enjoy. Take up a hobby you can safely do and that will keep your mind occupied. Thinking about the sex you’re not having won’t help you feel better.
If your inability to have sex is temporary, you can look forward to the day when you’ll be able to enjoy it once again. If you’ve been told you’re simply not healthy enough to have sex – such can be the case with someone with a severe heart condition, for example – you’ll have to come to terms with the fact that part of your life is over. There are many other healthy ways to channel that energy, of course. If you feel depressed about the issue, seeing a counselor to talk about your feelings can be very beneficial. There are still people who think that seeking help is weak, but this is really not the case. It can help you find other pursuits that you can enjoy.
While sexual activity is a large part of life for some people, there are other people who choose to make it only a small part of their life – or they don’t have it in their life at all. These people, if a lack of sex is their choice, are generally happy and don’t have a problem with their lifestyle. They have plenty of other things in their life that keep them busy and fulfilled, and you can do things the same way, if serious illness ends your sex life.
